reading assignment

i wanted to talk to you about something. Maybe it’s in my head but I feel like I’ve kinda been putting pressure on you about seeing each other more frequently, like even once a week.

I don’t wanna stress you out, when I think about living a day in your shoes I can understand how hectic it is. Don’t feel like you absolutely need need to see me once a week starting right right now if it simply isn’t feasible. There’s no rules, we make the rules :)

I really like that you don’t commit to a plan and then flop, for example. Not just with me, I mean overall. You make sure you’re present whenever your family needs you, you even planned out a visit to my house to see my family! You’re a woman of your word, I respect that a lot about you. And somehow we do see each other about once a week rn, I know it takes a lot of scheduling and a lot of potential inconvenience to make that happen and I appreciate it a lot.

We’ll take our time to find our stride, we’ll figure out what works for both of us in terms of how we spend time together. Like you call me here and there when you have some time during the work day and it makes me so so happy when we get to call.

But I realize that probably means between work, family and me, you have no time for you. The only thing I want more than you spending your time & energy on me is you spending it on you. I want solo-date journaling, new-hobby-finding reading-before-bed *** to make her comeback and stay for good. Maybe it’s cuz I grew up keeping myself company and learned to live that way, but I think keeping time for just yourself is really really important.

I feel like we’re really good at communicating our needs as a couple, and we don’t shy away from saying what we are good with/not good with. I’m very confident we can plan things out in a way where making time for each other isn’t complicated and doesn’t take away from everything else.

If scheduling meet-ups more in advance is what works, we can do that. If you want to do a date calendar thing, we can do that. If you want to take the lead for date plans, or you want me to be our planner, we can do that. Tbh even if it’s like “Arjun I can only really see you once or twice a month for a long date”, as long as we set that up in a concrete plan that can work.

50/50 doesn’t mean we both have to do the cooking and the cleaning, we can split things in whatever ways we like. If you want me to visit you in your ends for mini-dates <1hr a piece on a weekly cadence and once a month the bigger-planned stuff is half&half, however we wanna slice and dice it, it’s all possible. We’re teammates, soulmate ☺️

Okay that’s all I wanted to say, I hope it’s something you can smile at (I really love your smile)

I love you ❤️